Here’s the video you wanted to see. Watch Ridgely break down at the end of Chapter 1—very intimate and revealing. Click on the video now!
Watch Ridgely break down in Chapter 1–very revealing.
“Since I couldn’t read it myself, here’s the begining of the book. Take a look…” Ridgely
(click on link above – pdf opens in new window)
Please leave YOUR personal comment below—we want to hear from YOU!
Share a thought, an insight, a feeling for all of us. Thanks!
Ops! I´m crying! Thank you so much for sharing!
I am on my way to Marrakesh. It is only a few months left. I don´t know what to work with, where to live, who I am going to meet there and what friends I will make. It feels a little bit like swimming in the dark in the middle of the oscean. But it is ok:) There is nothing to worry about. Everything is going to be just fine:)
I feel calm inside and I am surprisingly relaxed about the whole thing. My mum and dad is not, but that is another story:)
Dear Ridgely,
Thank you for your being willing to share with us your open heart, wounds and all. In reading your responses, it’s clear that many, many other persons have had to surmount sometimes terrible barriers to their maturity and yet, like you, they keep moving upward.
Thank you so much for trusting us with your story. God love you, Ridgely, and I wish you peace.
So much to learn from each other. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!
TOUCHING, HEALING, FORGIVENESS, SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL; SEALED EMOTIONS ARE BACK, WORKING ON THEM CARES MARICARMEN
I would love to hear this video but it doesn’t play well at all. It breaks up and stops all the time. Maybe I have to add another programme,
Thank you Ridgely for sharing your touching story. I am with you.
I too was a child that experienced physical abuse. My stepfather abused my mother on almost daily. It was the fear that I lived with for so many years. It still hurts at times just thinking about it. I have been fortunate enough to learn about the law of attraction and how the universe works. I am currently studying the teachings and waiting for the Universe to supply my needs and desires. I appreiate your story…I grateful that I can share mine with you.
Hello Ridgley,
First, thank you for sharing your story here both on video and in your book. It is a courageous thing to work through those types of conflicts and to choose all the inner work required to actually grow and heal from them, and then share it all with the world.
I have, over many years now come to believe that we are each others Earth Angels in some way, teaching by our own experiences so that we may support and empower others to do the same. I read so many of these posts and I am so deeply touched by everyone who shared their own experiences here as well because like you, their choices redefined their lives, helped them heal, and they are making a positive difference because of what they’ve learned. That is a true gift.
My Mother came from an abusive family, and it was her absolute intention to never carry that forward to her own daughters. She was very successful, and has been the most loving Mother I can ever imagine, but it’s because she made a choice, and she did a tremendous amount of personal work to assure that she would never be the way her parents were to her. There is tremendous power is making deliberate choices. These kind of choices change lives.
Blessings to you, and all the best on your book and your continued journey.
Swelling floods of tears in my eyes bathes the truth.
thanks Ridgely for sharing a lifetime experience. often emotions linked to childhood seem lost or unable to surface and seem locked away forever -yet a word-a scene-a sound -a smell- crack open the vault of emotions and feelings rush to the surface with great speed exploding in a sea of rememberance triggering -tears-sorrow-joy-love-hate-compassion-longing-gradtitude-they are treasures that are never really lost only detained -sharing is an act of compassion which too little of us express mostly because of the stong emotions attached to it -yet in the end we all benefit in a heart felt healing process of attachment. blessings forever danny
Peace and blessing to you,
I know just how you feel,my mother was constantly mentally and physically abused.My father made my mother feel worthless,ugly and she believed it.My mother was such a beautiful person inside and out ,she died believing she was those things my father told her she was ,even after she left the abuser.
My father was a jealous man ,he was a mad person and took it out on everyone of his 5 kids and his wife.Everyone else outside our family he treated like gold,I use to say who is this person I love and why?
Watching your emotions brought back my own memories and what I learned as I grew up and had kids of my own( I had to run away from home to realized how not to abuse my family)
Was how to love my beautiful children and family ,to teach them not to except any man or women who did not treat them as God would treat them,that they could do anything they will too ,that they were beautiful inside and out ,to never give up,etc.I am glad to see another survivor who went past the cruelty and join those of us that are in peace,in love and harmony.
You are blessed.
Thank you for sharing
In peace,
Janet
well well is not healing and direction walk hand and hand. wow you know what that means WALK ON WATER yeah go figure. any how i have lost all these people in my life my best uncle,my Dad,my brother,my husbund ,my son,my daughter and my best friend who would have liked where I turned up but detachment is possible and we can move above. oh I am living proof and trust me I believe I have experienced healing almost there totally I can feel it . THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!
Aloha Ridgley.
Thank you for sharing. I personally have had a very good life while growing up. Unfortunately, it is now in life when I am following my dreams that I find myself very alone and unloved. No matter, I must continue because it is what makes me feel good, as a person.
Mahalo, Kathleen
Thank You.
Like you I had a mentor, and also like you I had a violent dad, mine was alcoholic, and I was the defender of my mum – I also made my dad laugh and diffused situations – unless he was really gone in the madness. I journeyed with my own alcoholism, 14 years in the maze of madness and met my mentor who taught me how to live in the now. Later I learned I had also been living with Asperger Syndrome – which was so liberating and led to more understanding of myself and my type – wonderful! Too much to tell here but one day I’ll put it out there – it is what I have to give – the story but more importantly the now – lovely, fabulous, wonderful, magical, XX
Thank goodness for the right people at the right time to extend their hand, sometimes without even knowing they’re helping.
Thank you Ridgely for reminding us of their existence.
Hi I over came a lot to when I was kid I had a uncle how molest me when I was 8 year’s old then my Dad molest me at the age of 10.He did that for a year or so. And a mother who blame me for her getting marry and divorce And today I’m doing grate I got over it. I don’t talk to my dad. I’m a very person today it took year’s But I’m very happy. don’t feel sorry for me.
This was my life as a child and I did married a man who was just like my father but I did get smart and left it was hard to leave but I did.
Hi this story is so moving and I am crying, I also had lots of obstacles in my childhood and had a very rocky road to travel when I was twelve we left Florida and moved to outback Australia on a vast cattle station where I had to learn to survive without pretty dresses and cold Christmas. We had a hot dusty environment making our own bread and surviving the heat, building roads, houses, drilling wells and learning to fit in what was known as a man’s world and trying to establish a comfortable home environment.
There was lots of tears and trials and errors growing up here. I am very interested in reading the rest of your book as I too hope to put pen to paper and write my story.
Ridgely,
I have to say I find you most brave to put your life story into words both written and spoken. I have known for many years I must write a book one day in hopes of preventing even just one young girl from blaming herself for all the wrong that can be done by dark and corrupted men.
Unless someone has walked in our shoes, they cannot possibly understand the turmoil inside of us when we are forced to experience negative and destructive experiences that have the potential to change our lives forever.
Some of us drown in the misery of it all and lead unproductive and tormented lives, while others of us, decide to just “live” instead. I have lived a life I would not want any young girl to ever experience.
I am now grown with two daughters of my own and a granddaughter, and I vowed to protect them at all costs.
I have been quite scared to put these experiences into writing. They are so very personal. You have encouraged me to take the next step. Watching you read out loud I could sense that you were the young boy. When I see stories like yours, or hear tragic stories in the headlined news, I immediately feel an urge to ask GOD to forgive us all. I pray for forgiveness from the child that was abused, or even worse… Prayer brings relief from the heartache as I am sure God will protect them now.
I am so grateful each one of us has the ability and the means to ask for forgiveness and to give thanks for all that we have. Thank you for sharing your heart felt story with us. May God wrap you in peace and forgive all that have offended you. Bless you always 🙂
Yes Linda …. 100% you can and need to share your story !
I am writing to be published, and it has been a long difficult journey [as common in some ways that was parallel to your story / the sample of Ridgely’s story, to arrive at the point of my life, to where I am in the position to do so.
The only road block / locked door holding me back, is my husband, and working through our emotional garbage … in moving forward. We are just not on the same page, in life … and most the time not reading the same books / socializing with the same people … while working through various indifference. As my #1 Coach [Sam Crowley] expressed at our Boot Camp gathering in Orlando, Dec 4th + 5th “Opposites attract” which I’ve known since Elementary School Daze !!!!!
I have to leave the room [most times] when Henry is asked by guest in our home, how our marriage is going. He retorts ‘Well there’s never a dull moment since I met her, and I’m not sure I like it.’ Poor, hard working / passive / laid back man !
He has a very difficult time of me speaking to anyone, when he is present, about my former husband / abuse that occurred in my past / verbal abuse I’ve been subjected to when I go places with him – due to my past life trying to destroy me, after my eldest daughter from first marriage took her own life. He’s a protector, who often suffocates me with what he thinks is shielding me from the ‘Big Bad World – filled with wolves [male / female], and I try to show him that I never go unarmed into the jungle … without my troops of those I trust company with / one heck of huge weapon in my purse. Our Police force / Soldiers / Social Workers and other countless helpers out there, are training us and recruiting all who are part of the solution, rather then contributing to the problems of the world / Mother Earth.
Ridgely ~ thanks for the bonus tips I needed, in your catch page / reading of our appetizer. Any one who doesn’t want to purchase the book, after reading the first 4 chapters …. for what ever reasons, they must enjoy incomplete thoughts / lessons / missing opportunities to expand their minds / heal their spirit and pain of life that has been inflicted on them. We were all born as perfect little beings / there was only the evil that lurks in this world that hurt / destroyed many … and from my studies of the Holy Spirits, of various religions – God will only show mercy towards those who have repented and turned away from such sin / criminal minds / activities. That grizzly old fishermen, reminds me of some who I learned lessons from … but that is only from what you read. He sounds like he was a wise Elder, who seem the nugget of gold within a precious child who had to bare so much from the hands of the man who gave him life, to begin with.
Our Creators blessings to each and all, in the new path to body / soul / mind, healing, through ‘Your Story’, and ‘Yours Linda’, as I know mine is going to hit the best seller list, in 2011. Possible launching of my products … New Year’s Eve … midnight. Won’t have to go through these computer crushes that Mind Movies and other excellent sites have been through, when they released an excellent offer / product, to raise a percentage towards wonderful projects ~ Like saving the Rain Forest / supply computers to students in underdeveloped countries. I have a Team of Trailblazers formed. Would love to tell you more, some day … when you have a book signing booth set up somewhere, Ridgely. As I know I need your book in my home library, as I move into a Consultant position of my Enterprise.
Three X’s
This is the Third time in as many weeks I have been faced with my pass. A pass of of confusion, abuses, Your story is hard to hear but it soothes me in some strange way to hear someone say and ask the question I wanted to ask? Thanks it time I face this Demon and Kill it I am not my pass I am my Now. again Thanks You I hope to buy your book soon.
Watched your video and I could relate to your feelings. Abused for many years (in the 1950’s) which created the person I am today, insecure, low self esteem, you get the picture. I’ve been trying for years to get over the childhood memories. The one that sticks in my mind is….over a lie from my sister, I was beat with the belt buckel and made to stand in the corner for a very long time. The next day my friends mother saw the condition of my little body and wanted to call the cops but I begged her not to because I would be beat again. How does a mother let this happen to a small child. I’m still working on things, it just takes so long and the older I get the more it comes to the surface. Here and now I wept for that small child.
Hi Ridgely,
Your story is true for so many people and I think it is brave of you to share it with the world. However I believe that you are still carrying these moments and events with you like baggage and that will be holding you back from really loving life (embracing both sides of life, the easy and the tough). Not the love as people normally define it, but the love of both sides of life, the supporting and challenging experiences. I reccomend Dr. John F Demartini. He has discovered that at any moment in your life you are being challenged and supported. You never get one without the other and the purpose is to make us grow and expand our consciousness. Look back to those moments when you were little and look for the person that was the over supporter at the same time. If you were being over supported and you were getting addicted to that support, then the over challenger will be there in your life to break that addiction. I am not putting a judgment on your fathers actions, but I want you to see how what happened served you. I could take you through Demartinis methods and actually help you love the contribution you father made to your life. Secondly, I want you to look in your life and see where you have expressed the same traits to other people that he did and how that benefited them. Where have you been violent. It doesnt have to be in the same form, but look until you own that trait. Every single person on this planet possesses all traits. Everything that happens to us serves a purpose and if you understand the laws of the universe and know how to ask the right questions you can collapse things that you have charges on in your past, which then breaks down fears that you have in the future. Because you realise by taking the time and putting in the effort to look that you never had a one sided event. This clears fears of the future because there was no evidence that it was any other way in your past. I experienced physical and verbal violence. I can now move on with my life because I looked. If my father had not done what he did I would not be who I am. My mother and other people in my life were oversupporting me at that time and I was addicting to it. They were supporting me, which keeps you juvenile. He was challenging me, which was making me independant. You need both because you grow best at the border of support and challenge. The more you addict to one side, the more the other side comes in to break that addiction. It is the opium of the masses, and it is being marketed and sold that we are only supposed to be positive and never negative. Nice and never mean, kind and never cruel. The truth is we are both and we will never be anything but both. Unless you honour both in yourself you dont really love yourself either. Both sides of us are loving. When I am being a bitch I look at how it serves me and others. If I am supporting someone, someone else will be challenging them. If im challenging someone else, someone is supporting them. It is a matrix and you cannot stuff it up. It is ordered nomatter what we do. Life will never give us a one sided event. If you think that you had a one sided event, it is just an unbalanced perception. You havnt looked for the other side. Take the time to look in your past and in your present. You will always have someone supporting you and someone challenging you, every moment of the day. It will be in different forms now but look its there. Equally you will challenge and support yourself in your own mind. Both are neccesary to lift you up and bring you down when you are cocky or inflated and lift you up when you are down. It is trying to equlibrate you. I am certain of the order in the universe and noone or nothing could ever shake me on that. I want you to see it for yourself and to live the most amazing and inspired life with nothing holding you back. You can continue with the victim mentality or look for the order and how it served you. I had depression for 10 years because I was imposing on the world and myself that life should be one way without the other. I only wanted the support without challenge and beat myself up when I wasnt getting it or giving that fantasy to myself. As soon as I learnt to have moments when I could see the order and service of both, that is heaven on earth. An equlibrate mind.
Love and Gratitude,
Sally
By love, my childhood was been shortened and with love, my time will extend.
(My time is not yet come, but in another time it has been fulfiled).
Alex G. Vu
Ridgely,
Very inspiring. I respectfuly invite you to visit http://www.yesicanproject.org/gold
I am thankful of this site and promise to pass it on.
Samuel Aviles
The Love Shark (group on facebook)
Hi Ridgely,
Thank you so much reading part of your life.i really want to know rest of the story
God bless
love
Achuta.India
Hello Ridgely.
Thank you so much for telling your life story. I can almost fill my pass when you talk about yours because i was and abused child and i also watched my mother being abused after years of ruuning away at the age of 18 i never went back. my mother stayed and the last night of her life they had a fight i heard that she got in the bed to sleep and for some reason she got up and got on the choach and never awaken she pass away 6 days before my brithday some i can identify with you thank you
Oh! my God, l heard those words ‘he has beaten her again’ and tears started flowing down my cheeks. Those were the exact words my son said and they made me make a major decision in my life. My little boy was young and vulnerable and the sound of angry words exchanged between me and his Dad almost every night were becoming too much for him at 2years. I thought thats it and asked my ex-husband for a divorce and l know it was the best decision l had to do in my 44yrs of my short life. Thanks for the support and inspiration, and hoping to one day put all that on paper for my kids to learn to live a life of love not intimidation.
Hi.
Thank you for sharing with us. I have a story also. It’s painfull to share right now. some day I may write my book and share what a child’s life is like having to live in foster homes and how one loving
woman was able to guide my intentions for a better life.
Gratefull
Heidi
I was so touched, and it too brought me back to a time when I too had a dad that did the same to me. Perhaps it may not have been as serious as yours but I know that fear that you spoke of, how you thought that he was going to come for you. I too know how it was to try to defend my mom, and being thown clear across the foor, and being threatened with death. I was so younge so impressionable that it left me scared fo so many years. I have finally healed from such sad memories, and I believe that I was born for a great and wonderful purpose. It was a pleasure hearing your story, and I too will soon be WRITTING down myne, for whomever wishes to listen to it. I hope that I can help someone in this world to see that “YOU are NOT ALONE ever.” My mentor is the SOURCE of it all, where I find peace, and a soft place to fall. The CREATOR, is always mentoring me, He mentors us all; we just have to LISTEN to the voice!
Thanks ; LEE O.S.
“Never ever give up” is my motto because you lose when you give up when you could be “Millimeters” from success and
1-Jim Rohn called the same principle “The Laws of Sowing and reaping” and qualified the laws by saying “”There are some things you don’t have to know how it works – only that it works. While some people are studying the roots, others are picking the fruit. It just depends on which end of this you want to get in on.” Jim Rohn and further
TAKE MASSIVE ACTION AND PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR LIFE AND
Don’t become a victim of yourself. Forget about the thief waiting in the alley; what about the thief in your mind?
It is not what happens that determines the major part of your future. What happens, happens to us all. It is what you do about what happens that counts.
You say, “The country is messed up.” That’s like cursing the soil and the seed and the sunshine and the rain, which is all you’ve got. Don’t curse all you’ve got. When you get your own planet, you can rearrange this whole deal. This one you’ve got to take like it comes.
Walk away from the 97% crowd. Don’t use their excuses. Take charge of your own life.
Take advice, but not orders. Only give yourself orders. Abraham Lincoln once said, “Since I will be no one’s slave, I will be no one’s master.”
You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of. You don’t have charge of the constellations, but you do have charge of whether you read, develop new skills, and take new classes.
Your paycheck is not your employer’s responsibility; it’s your responsibility. Your employer has no control over your value, but you do.
What happens to us in the end represents only 10% of the Issues but what is more important is how you handle the other 90% to find solutions to the issues of what happens to us because from the day we are born to the day we die (when our lease on planet Earth expires) we will be “Bombarded” everyday with Positive and Negative issues and in my opinion “God is testing us as to whether we are resilient to this issues and we fall into either two(2) categories we are either a “WORRIER WHICH IS 90% OF THE POPULATION” AND/OR A “WARRIOR/GLADIATOR LIKE THE ROMANS AND THE VIKINGS” WHO FOUGHT TO THE END?….ITS YOUR CHOICE.
Finally Henry Ford says “If you think you can do something you will and the reverse also is true that if you think you cannot do something you are also right”?…its a Choice and its YOUR CHOICE AT YOUR “SOLE DISCRETION 100%” THAT IS WHY WE LIVE IN A “FREE ENTERPRISE ECONOMY” ITS NOT FREE/GRATIS BY GOVERNMENT HANDOUTS BUT IT MEANS YOU HAVE THE CHOICE TO ENGAGE IN ANYTHING YOU WANT TO IN THE MARKET PLACE BY WORKING HARD AND “ADDING VALUE” TO PEOPLE AND AS LONG AS YOU “WORK HARDER ON YOURSELF THAN YOU DO IN A JOB” THEN YOU WILL BECAME SUCCESSFUL SIMILAR TO THE FISHERMAN WHO KEPT ON FISHING REGARDLESS AS TO WHETHER THE FISH WENT FOR THE BAIT AND BE PATIENT IT WILL HAPPEN IF YOU ARE CONSISTANT+PERSISTANT+LEARN TO FISH BY LEARNIG EVERTING ABOUT THE TRADE…REGARDS COSIMO
Thank you for sharing an excerpt from your book and sharing your deep emotional story. You are inspiring to me. I have been wanting to write a book for a long time about my childhood which was abusive like yours. You are inspiring to me, because by sharing your truth it helps not just you heal but others that read your story heal too. We see how you have learned to make a positive out of a negative in our lives. Very inspiring. Good work!!!! I need some of your feedback on writing my own story, it would be very welcome indeed.
Ridgely~
Not only is your story profoundly moving, the obvious impact you have had on the many lives by sharing it us just truly amazing. Your tale is one that will stir even the most hardened and bitter of hearts…for you to be able to take your adversity and turn it into something meaningful and positive is a miraculous blessing. Thank you for the gift of your heart and soul and vulnerability. You are a true warrior. All the pressures you’ve endured has made you the bright shining diamond that you are.
God bless you and your beautiful family~
Kristi
I just watched you reading the chapter and, I confess, I was a bit cynical….many years ago, I was among the first to discover all the books of chicken soup for the soul, books of Louise Hay and i was finally starting to find a way to give myself a push out of a black hole i was in.
unfortunately, I find this became a multimilliondollar business: books written on the same exact thing, “secrets” revealed and books over why these secrets did not work, same people recommending eachother! i kind of lost faith…..
which is a shame; after all, I am a mother of 4 who all of a sudden found herself alone to be in charge and take care of the family and bread….although i still have a long way to go, i certainly came a long way! i am successful at what i do and i provide with Gods help for my family.
all these ideas came from the inspirations I had from these books…i will read yours and hope the inspiration will return, after the disillusion.
as for you, keep the good spirit going….
Yo Bro,
Since we are lifetime brothers, I am sad this is the only way I can see you, but
you look great.
The story is very touching, and I knew you would touch many lives as you have mine.
I miss the old days of brainstroming around to pool table, but one thing has always been a constant…. you are a winner !!
You have always cared about others, and found the best venue to reach thousands of
people who too are looking to be successful.
You were always the person to tell me that success and wealth are never measured by the amount of money you have, but by the love and friendship that surrounds you.
Love you forever my brother,
Henry
Emotional scarring is a form of baggage we all carry with us our entire life. Choosing whether to unpack the baggage is often like cutting off part of one’s body – it IS very painful. BUT it is necessary and in the end healthy for one’s body and state-of-mind. I applaud your efforts in getting your baggage unpacked and out on paper and then making the choice to make your pain public so as to share with others that you are a Survivor and a successful individual.
Hi Ridgely,
The struggle that I’ve had to overcome is from depression at 10 years old, on and off until my late teens. Now I’m going on 23 in January and have been able to overcome and control this problem with time and new thought patterns. I want to thank you for putting this out and sharing your life’s story with a strong passion. I’ll be getting a copy as soon as I can. Thanks, and stay up champ.
Tony Torres
E. Palo Alto, CA
Hello Ridgely,
I don’t usually leave messages like this but as you started to tear up so did I. I had very similar experiences like you and my escape was through laughter. My father gave me some wonderful advice when I was a child and that was to make people laugh. I’ve used that advice all my life and I now find myself on a path of spiritual development, beyond my wildest imaginations. Just lately, I’ve discovered “Laughter Yoga” and knew instantly I wanted to share this with others. To impact people with this wonderful practice will give me great joy & peace and further transformation.
When we open our hearts to new possibilities the world opens up to new beginnings.
I look forward to reading your book
Namaste
Kathi Kimmins
Ridgely,
I’ve spent a lifetime with regrets, “Could have… should have, if only I had done this differently…”
I’ve had a life of much loss, and difficulties. I grew up on a large 160 ranch in Oregon. My parents built everything on that property… a huge 2 story house, a large barn, large garden… it was like paradise. I spent hours wandering the woods on that property with our dog. I loved it there.
Then the family business went bankrupt, and my parents were forced into foreclosure of that property by the US Government.. and this was way back in the 1980s. During the so called boom years. We lost everything, my parents decided to leave with dignity early before the Sheriffs would come and force everyone to be evicted from the house…. the same house my parents built with blood, sweat and tears, and worked on for years. It was their dream home… one they planned to retire in.
That never happened. We lost the family business, everything of the business was auctioned off. We moved out of Oregon to California to start all over again. My parents shortly got divorced.. I was sad to see my parent’s dream get destroyed. I had to leave behind my closest friends I had known for many years and grew up with in Oregon. It was hard for me. I was very bitter with the SBA when they seized the house to pay for the mortgage. They never bothered to negotiate a deal with my parents… they simply threatened my parents to GET OUT!! You have 30 days to leave or we will FORCE you out with the police. I was in tears, sad, frustrated, mad, I saw the SBA sign (seizure sign… property of the US Government) put on our driveway. I was so mad I wanted to rip the sign out of the ground. They didn’t give my parents a second chance. Because of greed for the property they snatched away my parent’s life long dreams. I never forgot that.
I watched my parents dreams get destroyed to where they both gave up on their dreams and split up. My dad is still bitter to this day about business… how businesses don’t work anymore. He let his dream die…. and went back to work as an employee for corporate america. He once had dreams of becoming wealthy…. I know as I still have some of his old business books from when I was just a kid. One of them was “How to Be Rich, by J.P. Getty who WAS the richest man in America in the 1970s. I had the same dream as my dad, but unlike him i have not given up. I keep on trying to succeed. I have not made it yet, but I refuse to quit or give up. I watched in horror as my dad “Retired” after 40+ years as a computer programmer, with debts, not enough money, barely making ends meet, and relying on Social Security.
My Dad COULD have been a millionaire if he didn’t give up. He had two opportunities that would have made him rich if he hadn’t given up. He owned properties in San Diego back in the 1970s!!!! Back when it was affordable. Had he held onto all those rental properties over the years he would have made millions. He sold all the homes too early in the late 70s, just before the real estate booms of the 80s and 90s.
My dad gave up on the American Dream. I haven’t. Where he is willing to settle for whatever he can get in life, I am not stopping. I am not going to give up on my dreams… even when friends and family are telling me to give up. The critics tell me I will never be rich and I should just settle for being poor and having very little. No… I have come too far! I may have failed in business before, but I still keep on trying. There are many heroes who keep me going, to keep me from giving up…. Richard Branson was so broke at one time he was selling records from the back of his car in his early years. Bill Bartmann was totally broke and homeless, without a dime at one time. J.K. Rowlings was a struggling welfare mom who had no job….until she wrote Harry Potter. All these people were once broke, struggling and had big dreams. They all made it! They just happened to become Billionaires…. I figured if they can succeed in life despite THEIR obstacles, I know that I can too. I will not give up on my dreams ever… no matter what happens in life….
Eric
Congratulations on putting your pain to good use for others,for being a guiding light.I am a wounded healer who gets remarkable results healing others,hence my joke nickname in my e address. I had a damged, cold, depressed mother who could not express love & a mostly absent father whose identity I did not know, but when he showed up in my teens he sexually abused me,which led to years of pain, a break down in my thirties and a string of dysfunctional relationships behind me. I was 50 before I found forgiveness,without which one can not heal. My mother just recently rejected me all over again (I am 57) and once again I re visited deep childhood wounds of being unlovable,invisible, unworthy etc but those wounds were brought back into the light of concioussness and cleared and healed. Including the intense pain of a broken coccyx (slipped on ice as a child),mother ignored it,I was in pain for weeks & had a lifetime of back problems. All recently healed for good!Love & Light does & can heal all, the gentle art of allowing! Gratitude for your courage to share your story!
I thank you so much for sharing that with so many of us who need that kind of inspiration to remind us why we are here and what potential we really have.
My story is one of a child growing up in an extremely dysfunctional family…then again, who’s family is “normal”, lol.
I was diagnosed with chronic depression in ’99 and just when I thought I was finally beating the disease, I had a severe accident in 2001 that I thought at the time had robbed me of my life, of my hope in getting therapy any longer as I couldn’t walk at the time and so I wallowed in self pity for at least a year during which time a physiotherapist would come to my home and use different types of machines on my knee as that was what was stopping me from being able to walk. Thank god for that physiotherapist!!! I was still very busy wallowing in my self pity even when I was able to get out of bed using help and had to rely on a wheelchair to get anywhere but there were two things I wasn’t seeing at the time. I not only was able to get out of bed which was a huge step for me but also had the capacity with the help of a wheelchair, to get out and do the things I could still do not to mention that once tests were run, I was told I would need extreme surgery on my knee but would be mobile after a year of aggressive physiotherapy after the surgery.
When I finally realized I could either continue lying on the couch all day feeling sorry for myself or actually getting out there with my wheelchair and being VERY GRATEFUL that it is only temporary, thank god I chose to stop feeling sorry for myself and started living again.
I realized what a gift I have been given through this accident. I was given the gift of time to do a lot of soul searching, I am currently working on an artistic project that I am anxious to put on the market which I wouldn’t have done if I didn’t have this accident and am constantly learning through the internet about my depression and what the best treatments are but also reading so many other people’s story on the depression they are living with and how they are coping with it.
The list could go on and on about all the gifts I’ve been given through all this but basically, this accident with my knee was definitely a blessing in disguise and I am so grateful for everything I am learning about inspiration, depression and most importantly for myself, hope!
Thank you so much once again for sharing this video with me as it gives me all that much more inspiration to keep fighting and to know anything is possible!!!
Melanie
HI RIDGELY, AFTER LISTENING TO YOU READ THE BEGINNING OF YOUR STORY AND THEN READING THE SADNESS IN THE COMMENTS, I AM DEVASTATED.
CHILDREN ARE SUPPOSE TO GROW UP IN A FAMILY WITH TWO PARENTS WHO LOVE EACH OTHER. THEY WANT TO SHARE THAT LOVE WITH THE CHILDREN WHO ARE THE CULMINATON OF THIER LOVE. THE PARENT’S NUMBER ONE GOAL IS TO NURTURE AND LOVE THEIR CHILDREN TO ADULTHOOD.
HOW IS IT THAT THE WORLD IS FULL OF STORIES LIKE YOUR OWN? WHY IS IT THAT TOO MANY PEOPLE IDENTIFY WITH YOUR STORY?
WE LIVE IN A FALLEN WORLD AND THE ONLY HOPE CAN BE FOUND IN THE GREAT LOVE THAT SENT JESUS TO THE CROSS FOR US. HIS LIFE EXEMPLIFIES REAL LOVE. THE KIND OF LOVE A MOTHER AND FATHER SHOULD FEEL FOR THEIR CHILDREN.
I GREW UP IN THIS KIND OF FAMILY. IT WASN’T PERFECT BUT IT WAS AFFIRMING. I STILL HAD TO DEAL WITH BEING THE ONLY GIRL IN A FAMILY OF THREE OLDER SIBLINGS WHO WERE MALE. THROUGH THEIR EYES I WAS EDUCATED TO BELIEVE THAT DOING ANYTHING “LIKE A GIRL” WAS AN ANATHEMA. IT WAS TO BE AVOIDED AT ALL COST. YET, MY MOTHER MODELED THE PERFECT “LADY” SHE WANTED ME TO BECOME. SO I ENDED UP DOING EVERYTHING LIKE A BOY WITH SHIRLEY TEMPLE CURLS IN A FLUFFY PINK DRESS.
CLIMBING TREES IN A DRESS IS A MAJOR CHALLENGE. TO CLIMB HIGHER THAN MY BROTHERS WAS MY AIM AND I ACHIEVED IT. MY LITTLE BOTTOM COULD FIT IN THE TINIEST FORK OF THE TALLEST TREES. IT WAS HEAVENLY SWINGING BACK-IN-FORTH IN THE BREEZE OVERLOOKING THE ROOF OF OUR HOUSE. MY ULTIMATE GLORY CAME, WHEN MY BROTHERS BEGAN TO PICK ME TO BE ON THIER TEAM BEFORE THEY CHOSE SOME OF THE NEIGHBORHOOD BOYS. I KNEW I HAD ARRIVED WHEN I MADE THAT CUT.
MY DADDY THOUGHT I WAS BEAUTIFUL AND TOLD ME I LOOKED LKED HEDDY LAMAR. MY MOTHER CAUTIONED ME THAT,”PRETTY IS AS PRETTY DOES” WHICH I TRULY BELIEVED. NO CHANCE OF GETTING A BIG HEAD IN THAT ENVIRONMENT.
THIS IS WHAT I WISH FOR CHILDREN EVERYWHERE—TO GROW UP IN AN ATMOSPHERE WHERE THEY ARE AFFIRMED, LOVED AND CHALLENGED. CHALLENGED TO BE THE PERSON GOD HAD IN MIND WHEN HE FIRST THOUGHT OF THEM. CHALLENGED TO PUT GOD FIRST,OTHERS SECOND AND SELF LAST. CHALLENGED TO LEAVE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE THAN IT WAS WHEN THEY ENTERED IT. IN THE END MAY THEY BE ABLE TO LOOK BACK AND SAY, “I DID THE BEST I COULD WITH GOD’S HELP”.
GOD BLESS YOU RIDGELY. GOD’S WAY AS WE KNOW IT THROUGH CHRIST IS THE ONLY WAY TO PEACE AND CONTENTMENT. THERE IS IN ALL OF US A PLACE WHERE GOD WANTS TO RESIDE. UNTIL GOD IS WELL ESTABLISED IN THAT SPECIAL PLACE WE WILL FEEL UNFINISHED, INADEQUATE, OR INCOMPLETE.
THANK YOU FOR SHARING YOUR STORY. I AM IN AGONY FOR THAT LITTLE BOY WHO DESERVED SO MUCH MORE LOVE AND UNDERSTANDING. MAY YOU BE FILLED WITH HIS LOVE JUST NOW.
Your transparency and willingness is powerful. You have, by example, offered a path to so many who need to find their own healing and strength. I like you Ridgely. Your family and friends are blessed to know you and be influenced by you. You do not come across as the rich guy who knows everything, telling all us ‘weaker people’ that we are fools if we do not find the same formula as you did. You are follow-able due to your humility and apparent compassion for others.
I had just decided to publish a dream to the universe “to help abused children” before i listened to you read. I am glad you had the old man to “catch” you. My grandmother played the same role for me. Maybe you are the mentor I need, although I was thinking of Bill Moyers, 😉 but that was before I listened to you read. We must do something. 30 years ago I was trying to develop a presentation to take to elementary schools, but I listened to the doubters. Some force is fighting me now, but I don’t want to give up…..not as long as I’m breathing.
I really enjoyed listening to you just now at Dream University.
Thank you for coming. I will pray for your son. With an emergency like that you took time to help us; that was so gracious of you.
You asked what I over came. I was told repeatedly, that I was fat, ugly, stupid, that I would never “catch” a husband and would have to clean toilets for a living. I did grow up fat and still am at 62; but, I am not as upset over it as my father. I actually am very attractive when I dress up. I have had a very successful career and have had success in the world of MLMs. I am just starting one where I help people save thousands on groceries. I didn’t catch a husband. 45 years ago, Larry had to work hard to catch me and we have been married ever since. Sounds nice and I really am blessed and happy. But, I also have a long way to go. I have much to learn and I am having fun doing so.
Personally, I think most people don’t have a clue on how to raise an emotionally healthy child which is so sad.
Thank you again.
TJ
I did not have childhood hardships. My parents each fulfilled their roles well. The roles were very defined in old fashioned male/female terms, but looking back, there was stability and creativity within that. The extended family was nearby and all got along. I had a sense of security, identity, love and value within that framework.
My current dreams however, do not fall within the old framework. So there is still work to do, lessons to learn, and growth to validate.
There are no regrets, only life experience to take us forward.
I am in the stage of my life where I need to overcome challenges and I hope I will.
Thank you for your story.
Dear Ridgely,
After a lot of pain, hurt and anger in my childhood I thought that everybody but me got the map to life. I didn’t know what to do, how to think or act in order to become happy. I was always working very hard to find small pieces of the puzzle that would in the end give me the whole map. Recently, when I finally decided to stop working so hard, to stop doing my best, I found true happiness. On this journey I have discovered how I create my life, I have taken responsability. I have worked very hard to get where I am now, but now that I have stopped doing my utmost best, my true talents and my gift to be happy are coming out. I can honestly say that in the past months I have been happy every single day and I now see why the great teachers say that everything we want to be is already inside of us. I still have my goals and am working towards them, convident that I will reach them and be happy and fulfilled along the way.
Thank you for sharing the beginning of your story with us.
Happy greetings from Amsterdam!
Baukje Westerlaken
By all outward accounts I had a normal childhood. But there is lots that others never see – those moments that create an ongoing internal dialogue that shapes our life. Oh how absurd it is how our parents can affect us. My father thought he wanted one thing more than anything: to have his son join him in his business. “Dad, I want to be a graphic designer and artist when I grow up.” “Son”, he would reply, “mostly only gay men go into that kind of work. What you want to do is come into the family business…” And so it went. It never mattered of what I dreamed, it was always the same thing. My dream was stupid, gay, what losers did, and so on and so on. My Dad died many years ago but but his legacy has lived on in me. Finding meaning in my life has eluded me. I never feel good enough or sure enough to make the decisions for those things I thought I wanted. Now I don’t know what I want. I wonder how much of this pain and alienation has grown out of the things my father said to me. I thought one day I would find myself and then maybe someone to share that person with. Alas, to date, I have not done either. No worries, (this is not a sorry tale of blame and regret) I haven’t given up and my partly filled glass still gives me so much more than so many will ever have in our world. It is just interesting how much of our parents can linger on in us into adulthood and make life a challenge, even when we know better, and even when they are gone.
Thank you for sharing too.
Dear Ridgely,
Your reading made me cry. I too was a wounded child who took a long time to turn the ugly into the loving. I am 55 years old, walked as a lone woman, fought for my space as I grew my nails back again. It takes nails to love. Now I am ready to belong, join the community and contribute. It took many years of solitude to trust that love existed. I wish you many books that speak of mentors, they are the ones who will bridge the generation with the children. The children can be taught to love by the elders. Only when they unite can a society function peacefully and our world be made a better place.
God Bless You,
Manon Laurin
from Canada
I feel everyday that I am living so far below the level I should be living, not just could be. I also had some very terrifying experiences as a child that have left scars and I often wonder how those scars might be the impediments that either contribute or are the root cause standing in the way of living a greater life. The sense of living a greater life actually haunts me as I have not figured out how to move from where I am to where I am continually feeling I should be. With that said I sometimes wish the feeling would leave since I feel lost trying to figure out how to chart the course to that nebulous greater life. I know that all great athletes, musicians even actors have great mentors and I believe that perhaps a mentor is what I need to guide me in some way towards the greater life I feel I should be living.
Thank you very much for your reading. I look forward to experiencing more from “thegreatonesonline.com” site.
Hi Darrell,
We are in the same place. I have read so many self help books all promising some magical future or assuring a clear purpose. None worked. I think that my problem was that I was looking for something that doesn’t exist – some preordained purpose that I would immediately recognize as being my life’s purpose. I am reading Flip by Peter Sheahan for my business and the second chapter has resonated with me and is pertinent to so much of my life besides my business. It is called: Action Creates Clarity. The essence of the chapter is that you must act without certainty and through taking action you make mistakes, learn, and gain new life experience that helps you reach a new level of clarity. I am no longer waiting for an epiphany. Maybe I will never find my purpose but I have vowed that I am going to have a lot more fun trying. And that means taking ACTION.
Good luck Darrell,
John L